Nightmare and theatre

I’ll start this blog with my nightmare and finish it with theatre, so we have something bright to end on, because man…… The nightmare I had this week had me shaking for a long time after. To be honest, I still feel like crying when I think about it.

The night I had this nightmare was a strange one. I woke up around a quarter to two and would wake up every hour after that. The frustrating thing is, every time I fell asleep again, I would pick up the nightmare where I’d left it to wake up. Here goes…

It starts with me waking up next to my partner, not sure if they were still alive. I left home nonetheless, figuring I was being to protective again. For some reason I was at my mum’s that afternoon. She told me in distress my partner had died, but couldn’t tell how they died. She could tell me for sure it had been in the afternoon, not in bed.

I decided to go to my partner’s parents to get more information and talk about the next steps to take. I felt shaken up, but couldn’t really cry. It felt more like a fake emotion than a real one, like I wanted to show the world how hurt I was, but didn’t feel it. My partner’s mum mumbled, but didn’t make any sense and their father immediately left when I walked up to him.

And now? No one could tell me how my partner died and I had to think ahead without any help at all. Well, I would need to let the bank know they died. Luckily we have an insurance for our mortgage just in case one of us would die. Then there’s the car. I would have to let the company that leases it to us know my partner died. They are the main user. Same goes for our telecom contract. How in the word would I manage?

I distinctly remember thinking, their dad won’t get their phone. That is mine! How awful of me! When it was time to get out of bed (thank goodness) I walked over to my partner’s side of the bed and hugged them real tight. I knew they where awake, because they asked if I had slept well. I asked to please not die on me again. The answer I got was: I can’t make any promises.

I felt the tears rise and knowing my partner is to down to earth to know how to react, left for the bathroom. I cried, because the loss of my partner felt so real! Horrible! I felt it all day and still, when I talk or write about it I feel so empty. Brrrrrr.

On to something that’s a lot less unnerving. I went to a tryout for the musical we will rock you. (Emagine an enormous amount of emoticons with heart eyes). (more). (Nope still not enough).(a bit more). (About right, but not quite).(yes that’s it)! Anastasia was killer Queen. It was sooooooo good. I would go every day if I could, but that’s not possible. To bad. Definitely one of the best shows I’ve been able to visit on me pass.

Love dreamer

The play, a book and a feud!

So update on the play I was in… It went well. The second day was a nightmare for the prompter, but the piece worked out non the less. Why was it a nightmare for the prompter you might ask… well. One of the people on stage was about a page ahead in the script, so the person he had his part with went along with him, but the other two on stage were at the right page, so…. The prompter had to skip ahead and back and we had to work twice as hard to make things look like it was meant that way without skipping on important information. It has been a blast. Now three weeks off and then rehearsal for a new piece will begin. Looking forward to it!

Now for this week. As you might have noticed on twitter I finally received ‘How to save your child from ostrich attacks, accidental time travel, and anything else that might happen on an average Tuesday’ from James Breakwell. In between it arriving, work and stuff I managed to get to page 19 and I can’t wait to read the rest. I might not have kids, but knowledge about how to keep kids safe from everything in existence and imaginary is something everyone needs. Can’t wait to start reading again, and that will happen after I’ve put this blog online! You should read it to! Go buy it! Here’s the link to his site:
http://explodingunicorn.com/ostrich/
You can read the description, see where to buy it and find more information and stuff from him. Mondays are the highlight of my week, because of his newsletter!

Between the tweet and now there has been more time than could have brought me to page 19. True, but… I was distracted. With what? The feud that is going on between two groups I follow online! At one point I read about Shipwrecked and Tin Can Bros bringing a short to buffer and putting it on YouTube afterward and the next moment I read statements on twitter on how the other party has stolen their script! I didn’t know what to think, so obviously I watched both clips. Same script indeed, what is going on? Don’t believe me? Go see for yourself:

Darn Tootin’ from Tin Can Bros: 

A Book By Its Cover from Shipwrecked:

At first I think, sure, you collaborated on it. They are friend, so why not. But then there is an announcement. Both of them have a livestream to tell us how it is their script. My time zone differs from theirs, so yesterday I spent four hours to watch them both and find out what the … is going on. First of all, there where people in the live chats that had the sole purpose of stirring thing up. I had a blast watching them both. After seeing this I am still not sure what the hell is happening, but I sure hope this is their way of showing us how unreal the world of moviemaking is. At the end of the Shipwrecked stream it has been said that things should be concluded by Friday, so until then I am keeping an eye on YouTube while I’m awake, because I NEED to know what is going on there.

If you like the things I do, you are probably already aware of the situation and as eager for the what’s coming as I am. That’s it for now. If you need me, I’ll be learning how to fend off some more animals. The next chapter will be Supernatural Beings, so I don’t think the book will come down before I’ve read the last letter. If there’s no blog next week, send the coroner, because I’ve forgotten to eat and drink while reading. Scratch that, make sure they check up on me sooner, how else will I be able to read more of James Breakwell’s stuff and find out what happens with the feud!

Love
Dreamer

Searching for a stage

The big weekend is finally here, we are performing our play! Last night we had our first performance. This afternoon will be our second and last. The first performance went well. I am happy as can be. I’ve gotten a lot of compliments, so that felt good and (crazy as it may seem) embarrassing. The thing is…. I took things to my dreams.

To understand my dream you need to know something first. The stage we perform at was taken over by a new company. Ever since they took over communications where…. let’s just. say below average. There have been several new contracts, costs were driven up. Not fun.

Our group is a very small one. Just six players. The first act ends on a leaking sealing, because I fixed a flush problem on a toilet. The previous two weekends we have been rehearsing at a primary school that has a little ‘gym’ area.

On to the dream.

We are standing at the stage and notice water coming down. We have no clue where it’s coming from, so we have a technician take a look at it. (sure, that’s the person to take a look at a leaking ceiling!). The man tells us we can’t do our play here, because it is dangerous with the water coming down. It could cause a short-circuiting and the building could burn down. Great, now what! We still have one performance to do and people have bought tickets! (not in real life, the buy them when they arrive). Our contact gets called and we ask for a solution. There is none. None of their other stages is free. Too bad for us, but shit happens, we should learn to live with it.

We try going to this military looking building where the big bosses are stationed. When walking up to the gate it closes. Clearly they don’t want to start a conversation about our predicament. The person of our group that has made all the arrangements with them did get inside, but came out with bad news. They are not going to help us.

Naturally we don’t like the answer, so we decide to go into the city to find another place to perform. Our group is suddenly about twenty people, because we are waiting for them in front of the company that bought the stage. (their chiefs resided in the military complex, but we have always had contact with the people in the building where another stage is.) I decide to try something. They don’t know me there, so why not see if they just don’t like our ‘group’.

I go in and pretend not to know them, but I am looking for a performance place for that afternoon. I know it is short notice, and I understand if they can’t help me. It has been chaotic and things happened why we needed some last minute space. The lady I talk to is very nice and positive. She takes a look in her computer and has some good news. She has some space she can put us in. It’s not the best space, but it is space. How many people do we think will come to see us? I give her the same numbers they got from us before, but she doesn’t connect the dots and I don’t make her any wiser yet.

We all go to the new stage. It is a school gym. It will work. We start setting up and the lady I talked to before starts drawing up a contract. I tell her she doesn’t have to. We already have one. Unfortunately I don’t know her reaction, because that’s where I woke up.

Man that was weird. Things your mind can do right! Well I’m off to the theatre to perform our piece one more time.

Love,
Dreamer

White rabbit

I guess everyone knows the story of Alice in Wonderland. I kind of feel like the white rabbit at the moment. Like there’s not enough time to get things done. Why? Well remember I’m in a theatre group? Our performance date is closing in fast!

We will perform our piece on the 16th and 17th of this month (November). About a week ago we had never run through the piece in one sitting, at least not while playing, we had managed getting through it just sitting and reading our lines.

Since the performance date is closing in we decided we needed extra practice. Not just for our lines, but to practice with a fully dressed set as well. That helps, because things go differently when you and the set are dressed as you are supposed to be. The thing is, normally we rehearse on Wednesday evenings, but these extra rehearsals are on Saturday and Sunday!

So this is how last week went: Every weekday, except Thursday (my standard day off) I went to work. On Wednesday evening we had our standard rehearsal (8:00-10:30 p.m.). On Friday I went to the theatre after work, like I usually do. The thing I wasn’t aware of was the length of this play. It started at 7:30 p.m. and I walked out of the theatre at midnight. The piece was three times an hour with a break in between. It wasn’t too long, I could have watched more, but I got in bed late because of it.

The next morning I had agreed to meet a colleague/friend at the gym before rehearsal, so we met at 7:00 a.m. to work out. After that I had to get home quickly, get showered and my stuff together (all in half an hour) to get to the rehearsal location. We have to take our own props, and I am one of the lucky ones. I don’t have that many clothes and props, and still it was difficult to take everything with me to another city on my bike. It rained as well.

We rehearsed from ten to three, then I went home to cook and that evening I went to the theatre again. A comedian I love had a show, I truly wanted to see him live, so….. What could I do? Lucky for me one of the people from my theatre group said she’s pick me up the next day, so I didn’t have to cycle. That helps. So Sunday was rehearsal again and behold, after sleeping I had to get to work again.

This week is not getting much better. I don’t have to be at the gym on Saturday and I only have to be at the theatre on Friday, but other than that it’s pretty much as busy as last week.

Next week is going to be a nightmare. We are getting a new system at work, so we need to follow a four day course. Two days on your own and two days ‘in class’. Guess what…… I have to be at work on Thursday and Friday. Friday is Aida (the opera), and I have to see that, so I have a ticket to see that. The next day we will have our own performance, and the day after that once more.

See, I feel like a rabbit out of time, but I will manage I guess. Sorry for the rambling on. Not even a funny dream on anecdote, but hey, this is my life at the moment! And if there’s no blog next Thursday, at least you know why, right? That’s nog a threat (of promise, but I guess you wouldn’t be on my site if you feel it is a promise), because I will try to write next week, there’s just no guarantees.

Love
Dreamer

Google thingy

Yeh, I know it probably has a name other than Google thingy, but I don’t know it.
I have seen the thingy because my partner brought it into our home.
Why? Because my partner works at a store that sells them. If you want to sell something, you need to know how it works, or at least the basics. My partner already knew the thing from work, but apparently we need one in our home now, because it should work in our own language as well as English. And so the Google thingy entered our home.

I have hear of Siri, but I am not a big Apple fan (sew me), so I have never seen such a thing live. I did not know google had this thing you can put in your home to ask questions to and give commands to turn on lights and appliances. I still don’t know what to think of it, but the first evening the thing was in our house was funny as hell.

Yeh, she should be able to speak and interpret my language and she does I guess, but…. She is far from perfect and that makes things hilarious. Why do I say she? Well it has a female voice. I don’t know if you can have a male voice for the thing, I should ask my partner if that is even possible, or maybe I can learn it from people who know how this Google thingy works if you leave a comment.

So why is she hilarious. A couple of things. To begin with, she has my sense of humour. I mean her jokes are so lame, I love them. They are not really jokes, they’re one-liners. I searched on the internet to find an English version, so here it goes: “What is a sea monster’s favorite snack? Ships and dip.” My kind of humour. When I was a lot younger there was this joke that cracked me and a friend of mine up (still does). Everyone else that heard it looked at us like we were insane to find it funny enough to role of our chairs with laughter. Here’s the joke, just so you know what a nut I am: “To camels walk through the dessert. One camel say to the other camel: “the weather’s nice, isn’t it?” The other camel replies: “Shut up! Camels can’t talk!””. Yep still does something for me, I am grinning madly while typing it 😀

Back to the google thingy. My partner tried to get her to open Netflix. She opens Netflix in YouTube. In other words, you get a commercial for Netflix on YouTube. This goes on for twenty something minutes. My partner actually asks the Google thingy to open music in YouTube, she opens it in a music application on our TV instead of YouTube. I found this hilarious. My partner kept tinkering with the settings in the hopes of getting it right. Alternated with asking her to tell a joke, so I could not concentrate on what I was doing because I find her jokes so funny (most of them at least).

O and the lights, my partner kept going on: “Oke Google, turn the lights off” with the standard reply: “I am turning off two lights”. Then my partner would say: “Oke Google, turn the lights on”, with the standard reply she was turning on two lights. You can imagine, as hilarious as it was at first as tedious it became after a while. When I had more than enough I asked my partner if they were done. Nope, not until I had talked to Google. Asked her to turn off the lights.

Now you would say that is easily done, talk to the thing and have a little peace and quiet. Yeh…. Thing is, I could not talk to it. It felt so weird, so uncomfortable, I could not do it. I took a deep breath several times to start the sentence: “Oke Google, lights off”, but every time he words got stuck in my throat. I could not talk to Google, not with my partner there. It felt to weird. Then finally, on my way upstairs in passing the thingy I did a quick: “Oke Google, lights of” and walked on upstairs as fast as I could.

The Google thingy has been in our house for a couple of days now. I feel a little more comfortable in asking her to turn on lights or the radio, but it still is a weird thing. Think of it… how long before the computer grows a mind of its own and determines it doesn’t like taking orders, so it plots to kill you with your own appliances, just so it can get a little peace and quiet. I am not taking my chances, I ask as politely as I can and I thank the damn thing after it did something I asked for. Even if it tried and tells me it can’t do it yet, but it is still learning. Yes, it tells you it is still learning…. so you better be polite to you stuff, before it turns of your light instead of the lights in your home.
I know I’ll try to stay friends with my Google thingy.

Love
Dreamer

Late again,

And again: NO NOT PREGNANT! Just busy.

I have been shopping the first Thursday I didn’t post anything. You might say: “how does shopping justify not writing a blog. That doesn’t take up a whole day!” It die, because I went with three other people and the shopping was going on quite some way from home. So our journey started quite early in the morning and ended quite late and so I simply forgot you guys. I’m sorry.

Last Thursday I didn’t have time because of household chores that needed to be fine. Normaly I would do those on Saturday, but I got picked up early last Saturday for a visit to the sauna and the people that picked me up would sleep over afterwards, so I had to do everything on Thursday.

I decided to write one early this week. I had the opportunity to do do because I am on a bus right now for work. A fun day ahead of speeches and workshops. Wihoo.

So what’s new with me besides the things I bought while shopping?

Nothing much. I quit something again. “NO” Yes. “What did you quit this time? Your job?” Nope, just choir. “Why? You love singing in the choir!” I do. But if you remember, I am lazy as well. Choir started at eight p.m. and I work untill about five p.m. After coocking and eating that leaves me about half an hour to do whatever I want before I have to leave for choir again. That is the point where I don’t want to leave anymore. I haven’t been there for about six weeks. Since I pay to participate I am throwing away money, so I quit.

That doesn’t mean I stopped singing. I still sing while cycling. The difference is that I actually sing music of my own choice now. I don’t think I will ever stop singing. Just so you know.

Another thing that happened is a parent of a friend of mine died. In having lost mine and knowing how good it felt that many people came just to support me I wanted to be there for this friend. I asked if I could come, got a positive answer and arranged I could go with work. Or… arranged….. said I wanted to go and everyone said: no problem, go. And so I went. I left home at seven a.m and got back well past nine p.m. It may sound stupid, but it was a beautifull day. Not the fact that someone had died or so many people felt sad, but the fact that it was a beautifull service and it the energy felt good in the support there was for everyone. I hope I could make a small difference by being there.

That’s it for now.

Love dreamer

Dream

We start at a beautiful house amidst a sea of trees. I will not be the only one staying over, but I like everyone that will be there, so why not. That evening when Ethan is in bed we sit outside by the fire and talk about the discovery Melissa made.

Let’s do my name some justice. Dreams are a way of your brain to deal with things. I will give you a chance to analyse the one I woke up from. The characters have improvised names, created by an online generator,  for better reading.

We start at a beautiful house amidst a sea of trees. It is made of stone, not those red bricks, but those nice grey/brown stones that have different sizes There is enough room for three or more families to live there, but when you drive up to it you think you see a nice small cottage. Because there is no one around for miles there is lots of room for children to play, which is a good thing, because a friend of mine lives there, and she has a little boy.

I will not be the only one staying over, but I like everyone that will be there, so why not. We have all been friends since we were kids, so I looked forward to seeing Patrick, Rafael and Vivian as well. Upon arrival I get a very warm welcome from Melissa and her six year old son Ethan. I am the first to arrive and happy to be there. The outside might look rustic, but once inside you forget you are in the middle of nowhere. It is quite a sight, all walls are white glass, the chairs are crème coloured leather with a metal base and the tables are made of glass. All cabinets are worked into the walls, so you barely notice them.
The kitchen is one of those family places with a high nut-brown counter with matching leather high chairs where everyone can sit and eat and a cooking area a professional would gladly use.
Every room in the house has its own style. Then there is the seating area you get to when you walk out of the kitchen door. Outside there is a nice place to lounge. Long standing lamps along the wall for when you need some extra light and a stone circle to make a ‘campfire’.
I love this house.

Melissa tells me she has discovered something. She is not sure what it is, but she would like to show me. There is something I should know first. What she is about to share should not be seen. She discovered that looking at it is dangerous, so I have to close my eyes. She found this ‘thing’ some time ago, but is not sure what it is.
I am excited, ‘show me already will you!’. We go into the living room. Melissa tells me to close my eyes while she gets a remote control and closes her eyes as well. One of the walls opens up. Behind it there is some sort of television screen. Even though my eyes are closed it is as if I have them open and am looking to a screen of static. Ethan walks into the room and sits on the ground in front of the screen, looking at it, not closing his eyes like his mum told him to. There is a wonderful melody coming from the screen and within the static, lines are visible, words and pictures alternate. I have no idea what it is I am seeing or hearing, but I feel more relaxed than ever.

After a while Melissa closes the wall and we open our eyes. “That is quite an experience” I say. She agrees and we talk about her discovery for a while.

After everyone else has arrived we have a great time together. We talk, we laugh, we eat, we relax. Ethan makes everyone laugh like only a kid can with stories and goofing around.
That evening when Ethan is in bed we sit outside by the fire and talk about the discovery Melissa made. We have all seen it and none of us has a clue as to what it could be. At one point I ask her if it is not dangerous to have something unknown in the house. We all start to agree that it might be dangerous and maybe it is not good for Ethan to be around it. After all if you can’t look at it, how well will Ethan listen to being told he should not. And what happens if you look? At that point one of the standing lamps falls down, taking some cables with it and creating loads of sparks from hot wires. I launch at the thing, find the button to turn it off and click it. The danger has passed.  “What the hell has just happened?” Rafael wonders. Before we can respond however the lamp gets turned on again. “How is this possible, you just clicked the button did you not?” Vivian asks, “I did!” None of us know what tot think of this, but we all agree it is creepy.  Patrick clicks the button once more and the lamp stops emitting sparks. We decide to go into the house.

We all think the same. Do not talk about how strange this is, gather your things and LEAVE THE HOUSE. So we all start gathering our stuff while talking about nonthreatening things like the weather. The house feels different now. The feeling of serenity has been taken over by the earie feeling of being watched from the shadows. While getting ready to leave we hear footsteps on the stairs. Ethan is standing there, tears in his eyes. “Are we leaving mummy? He does not want us to leave, we have to stay.” Now we know for sure none of us want to stay here a minute longer. Melissa grabs Ethan around the waist, we take wat we have at hand and we walk out of the door like he whole place is on fire. Light starts flickering, loud music starts playing, the whole house has just come to life. Outside I decide to call the police, but right before I press the button to light up my screen Rafael says: “You have been charging you phone in there have you not?” All of us look around, trying to figure what the others are thinking. I press the button, there is only static visible, a feeling of doom spreads through my body………

And at that point I woke up. I can tell you, the feeling of doom lingered even when I awoke. I tried hard not to think about anything, so I could remember as much as possible to share with you. I started out typing key words, so I could not forget the mayor points of the dream and I think it is typed up quite accurate, but putting on paper what I saw in my dreams is not easy, because the details leave my mind so soon. Still I hope you enjoyed my dream. Maybe you can figure out its meaning, if it has one. I am terrible at that kind of thing. I blame it on the books I read, the shows I watched and the alcohol I drank at a party yesterday (and no, I was not drunk, three glasses of red wine on an entire evening and enough food throughout the day). There is only one thing on my mind right now, I hope I don’t get trapped inside that house ever again, because it gave me the creeps.

Love
Dreamer

Loss

At times I feel guilty for not crying. I know I have a heart and even though I say so myself, I think it is a good one.

Remember Bambi? The moment his mother gets shot. I cried, as did loads of other people. Same when Mufasa died. And ET, the moment he got sick and later when he went home, I was crying like crazy. As soon as a movie or series gets a little emotional I get a lot emotional.
Sometimes I even get emotional over nothing at all. It probably happens when there are a lot of emotions inside of me I am not really aware of, but it can be quite awkward. You are watching a comedy, someone walks into a lamppost, everyone is laughing, I am crying.

This happens to me quite often, but I try my best not to show this when there are people around. It does not feel very comfortable to cry when people see you. I guess you can relate to that. The blotches that you get on your face and the strange angles your lips, nose and eyes can get when you really lose yourself in crying.

Not too long ago I lost someone dear to me. It was the second time I lost someone very close to me. Not close like friend close, close like family close. I had lost uncles and aunts and sorts, but this was living in the same house close. Now if I can cry when someone hits a lamppost then I should be able to cry when I lose someone close to me right?

Wrong. I do not know why, but crying over the loss just does not happen like I thought it would. I cried at the funeral and the days leading up to the funeral, but with both losses I blanked more than I cried.

At times I feel guilty for not crying. Did I not love them enough to grieve over them? I tell you, I know I did. Still do. They meant the world to me, but crying is a rare thing that happens when I think about them. Most of the times it feels empty of like they never left. Next time I go over to their houses they will be there. I know they won’t be, but it does not feel like they are gone. Is that why I cry so little.

It took me two whole years to somewhat understand the first loss. Will it take as long for the recent one? I surely hope not, because I doubt it is healthy, but it is what it is.
I told myself to show how I feel, even when I am in public, and I do when it comes to these losses, it is just…. It seems like I do not feel.

How did I come to writing this? This weekend I broke down a little over the last loss. It took about ten minutes. The first three were intense, then it quickly subsided. It felt good to break a little, it felt human. In typing this I found an answer I did not find earlier in asking myself if I am just a heartless human being. I know I have a heart and even though I say so myself, I think it is a good one.

I have known I have a heart from the moment I wondered why there is little emotion. Now I know. It is not the fact that I don’t love them. The emptiness I feel is there because when they died they took a piece of my heart. Not big enough to leave me heartless, but big enough for them to always have a place to stay. I get the piece they took back when I join them. I feel so much love and pride for them, that the tears that are certainly there will always be followed by a smile. My mind is ahead of my tears and starts smiling when I think of them, rather than crying.

Maybe I live through it as if being a small child. The little ones grieved, but had this great ability to bounce. The day of the loss one of them came to me and told me that his grandpa died, he was a little star now. There we are, back at the Lion King where Mufasa tells SIma that the great Kings of the past look down on us from those stars and will always be there to guide us.

I know there will certainly be times when I shall cry, but those times will be few. The love I feel for them however, will be there all the time…. Forever.

 

Love
Dreamer

Weird

Sometimes it is just too much, the feeling of being different.
They are the ones missing out, not me.

Sometimes it is just too much, the feeling of being different. Most of the time I am OK with it, but sometimes I am not. It feels like I have been a misfit my entire life. Most of the times it is ok now, but there will always be people that make you feel like you do not belong, you should not be there.

What is it with these people? Why is it so bad for me to be different. Not different in a physical way (at least not that I am aware of), but in a mental one. If you think I have a disability, no, not that I am aware of and never diagnosed. I am just different.

I have never found out why people react to me the way they do, but it has been like this for ever. People who do not really know me think I am weird and people who do get to know me either appreciate my weirdness or run like hell, as if they do not want to catch whatever it is I have.

Even though I am officially an adult, I never completely go with acting like one, at least not always. If I have to for work or anything I can, but most of the time I do not. I like showing what I feel, I like including everyone instead of just  a couple of people, because they belong to this group and not the other.

Why is it people want everyone to fit inside a description? Why can we not be who we are without the world thinking we have a screw loose (or as a quote on the internet says: “I do not have a screw loose, it fell out). I do not want to be like everyone else, and even if I did, I do not know how, because this is who I am. I like to like  everyone (even people who annoy me), I like to give people a second, third or even a fourth chance.

Is that why people react to me like I am a disease? I know, most people do not act like that. At least not to my face, but sometimes you hear people talk when they think you are not there or cannot hear what they are saying. To be honest, it is pretty devastating. I try not to let it get to me, knowing I am who I am and I want to keep faith in everyone, but that is difficult sometimes.

Is it fear, jealousy, the feeling that you are above someone else? What is it? Why am I weird, not accepted the way that I am. As far as I know, I never purposefully hurt anyone if I could avoid it. I accept people the way they are, because it was taught to me by my parents. We can all be who we are and make the world a colourful place.

Well I tell you, sometimes I want to fit in with the crowd, not stand out because I am colourful. At those times  I hate who I am and I strongly wish not to be. Then I start thinking about things that are beautiful because of those colours.

People with a colourful soul attract other colourful souls.  I know I have. When put together we make a beautiful painting. We enjoy thing so much more intense because of the colours we bring and see. I should not feel sorry for myself for being weird. I should feel sorry for people who cannot see past the walls that have been put up by society. They are the ones missing out, not me. I hope I will never cease to make a beautiful painting instead of just shades.

 

Love
Dreamer

Cheating

I have never ever cheated in my life (unbelievable, I know, but true). ..Then why do I have the feeling I cheated?…here I go, correcting my cheat.

I have never ever cheated in my life (unbelievable, I know, but true). The one time I tried was because a teacher told me to and I did not go through with it because everyone in class told me not to forget to cheat when we sat down for our test. Weird right, for a teacher to tell you to cheat. The reason my teacher said I should try and cheat in his class? I never got a passing grade for his subject (a language, you had to take the subject for a year before you could drop it). He promised us a treat if everyone got a good grade (sorry everyone, again no treat because of me) and he felt sorry for me, so he said, ‘cheat without me knowing about it’. Nice man. I made a little note for in my pencil case and the others noticed me making it, so the blew it by making fun of me while the teacher could hear, so again no treat for them. They never got one while taking the subject with me and I feel good about it, because I did not cheat. I just do not like cheating!

Then why do I have the feeling I cheated?  I feel like I cheated a couple of days ago, I cheated Campervan Man out of some good answers. He just got the short version, not the explanation. So let me correct that please, and I will make a change if you do not mind, because afterward I thought, nope, you are wrong about your favourite word. So here I go, correcting my cheat.

  1. I love beaches, because you can enjoy them without having to do a workout. I like doing as little as possible when away from home. I do like a good mountain view, but only if I can drive up there. And beaches have this romantic feeling, walking along the water’s edge with the person you love while the sun is setting. Building sandcastles, or in my case sand mountains, because I am just not any good at castles.
  2. Now I said Love, because this feeling can conquer a lot of things, but after even more careful consideration it is supercalifragilisticexpialidocious. Wow, Word actually recognises the word!!!!!!!!!!!! I do not believe that! And I have just given away how I make less mistakes than I would have on my own in writing English. But there it is, Mary Poppins tells you why it is such a good word. When I feel bad, this word actually makes me feel better. Not many words can. The word love itself will not do that, the emotion/feeling will, so there, that is why I changed words (and cheated in that way, I am soooooooo sorry)
  3. I do not need to change this answer, there is nothing to ad. It says it all. The best place to be in the whole world is home, because everyone I love is there. Home is where your hart is, so home I an elusive answer, but it is the right one for me.
  4. I would invite Curt Mega and Jon Cozart to dinner. There are a whole lot more of those guys I would like to be there, but I had to choose, and it was difficult. I picked two of the bunch that I know of their single works on YouTube. I love their things and I would like to talk to them, so why not while eating a nice meal. I think it would be a nice long diner with a lot to talk and laugh about.
  5. I would rather fight 1 lion sized hamster, because at least you can keep an eye on that thing, if it were 100 hamster sized lions they could attack from all sides. I think I would get killed either way though. I am a useless fighter, trust me I had that tested once. A man wanted me to come home and do the nasty, but I told him no. Words did not work, so in panic I elbowed him in the chest with everything I had (we were both seated on a park bench) and all he could do was look at me and say, what, you do not like the idea (it did not hurt him one little bit) HELP!!! I just stayed in the park were people could see us until he left and went home the very long way, just in case.

There, I hope I made up for cheating the first time around. I am sort of glad I have cheated the first time around, because of the length of both posts. This one has become quite a long one again, as was the other one.

Hope you enjoyed this.

Love
Dreamer

Mystery blogger award!

No Way this is happening!!! I feel so radiant, the sun has nothing on me

No way this is happening!!! I have just started this blog and then this…… thecampervanmanblog sends me a comment, telling me “Hi, I’ve nominated you for the mystery blogger award!” I blushed. Not just a little, bright red. I feel so radiant, the sun has nothing on me. Thank you sooooooooooo much.

Not too long ago I saw another blogger had visited, so I took a look at his blog and boy! I read through his post like I people go through Netflix. Read everything in one take (I could not make it in one take, because life wanted some attention, but I gave it a good try and did it in three takes).
If you are done reading this, take your time and go to his blog, because he helps you travel, while staying in your seat, and boy what adventures… I cannot wait to read more of his travels…
https://thecampervanmanblog.com

The Mystery Blogger Award has some ‘rules’ to it, and some questions of thecampervanmanblog to answer, so here I go:

RULES

  1. Put the award logo/image on your blog
  2. List the rules.
  3. Thank whoever nominated you and provide a link to their blog.
  4. Mention the creator of the award and provide a link as well
  5. Tell your readers 3 things about yourself
  6. You have to nominate 10 – 20 people
  7. Notify your nominees by commenting on their blog
  8. Ask your nominees any 5 questions of your choice; with one weird or funny question (specify)
  9. Share a link to your best post(s)
  1. Done
  2. Done
  3. I know I already have, but thank you sooooooooooooo much again, I still don’t believe this.
  4. This award is created by Okoto Enigma to help us discover and recognise amazing blogs. Go see for yourself, and while you are at it, nose around 😉 https://www.okotoenigmasblog.com/my-greatest-creation-yet
  5. This is a difficult one, but I will give it a try after I worked through the other points.
  6. and 7. I nominate the following people

https://hannaswalk.com
beautiful pictures and words

https://alipatoblog.wordpress.com
I just love those photographs

https://shortstorymagictricks.com
I just love reading, and it is such a joy to read what stories bring for others.

https://toffeefee.wordpress.com
a beautiful way to watch the world through their pictures.

https://radhikasreflection.wordpress.com
I truly like the view on things. Fine examples on this site are thinking out of the box and anger.

https://piratepatty.wordpress.com
when you don’t know what to read next or you want to find out what books are out there, go have a look!

https://ididnthavemyglasseson.com
The posts may be small, but the massages are huge!

https://doodlewash.com
I just love the story’s with the paintings, I feel like I am sitting at the table while the thing is made…

https://thesarahdoughty.wordpress.com
feelings so deep, I cannot describe, just see for yourself

https://lifexperimentblog.com/
a blog that has many things to offer, so for my different moods there are different options

 

  1. Five questions for my nominees:
    – What is your favourite colour?
    – What do you love most about people?
    – Whose mind would you want to read?
    – What is your favourite season?
    – What did the toothfairy say when se last visited you?
  2. https://publicdreamerblog.wordpress.com/2017/10/21/purpose/

And now for answering some questions as promised, if you want to know what the questions were: https://thecampervanmanblog.com/2017/11/02/nominated/

  1. Beaches, even though I do not dare go in the water unless it is clear as glass.
  2. Love
  3. Home, everyone I love is there
  4. Curt Mega and Jon Cozart
  5. 1 lion sized hamster

So only one thing left, for the keen observer, to tell 3 things about myself:

Even though I am technically an adult, I love watching kid stuff, such as dora, transformers rescue bots, that sort of thing. I think I want to be a bit like Peter Pan, never grow up (at least nog completely)
When I was younger I was jealous of Belle, because beast gave her a library. Nowadays I have got a small one myself and I am very proud of it (even though I do not make that much time to read with the distractions of internet and life going on).
I love sleeping and eating, but I hate to exercise, so I have a difficult time not growing out of my clothes, but I manage 😀

Well that’s it I guess.

Love
Dreamer