Ok, sometimes you just need to make yourself feel better right? At least that’s the point where I am now. I am done with the way I look, the way I feel, the way I act. So what do I do about it?
I decided I have been lazy long enough, time to go about things differently. I don’t know if I can make it happen or how long it will last if I get where I want to, but I have made a start.
Most of my clothes don’t fit me anymore, and years back I made myself a promise, I was not going to let myself ‘grow’ to much. I don’t go shopping for new pants when I am at my largest, because the they will become bigger and bigger. Right now I am at a point I need to take action. Other people say it is not that bad, but if I let myself ‘go’ it will get to a point of no return. So let’s do this!!! The doctor said I should be able to do everything, so I have no excuse to be lazy anymore.
I hate the gym, if I register I stop going in no time. I have tried that before. Going with friends does not work either, because after a while I will find excuses not to go even if my friends tell me I should. How do you go about things then? Well, I did two things to start with and there is something else I intend to do, but I thing that will be hard to go through with, because I am addicted.
The first thing I did was ask a friend of mine to become my personal trainer. He agreed and last Saturday was our first session. Keep in mind I have not been doing anything for a very long time. I ride my bike to work, but I even cheat at that, because it is an electric bike.
So my friend took me to a training field. The first thing that went through my mind was “o no, people will be able to see me!” I am so out of shape an now people will see me struggle at working out! I will be flailing around like a fish out of water, while these people are doing true workouts and having something funny to talk about later.
My friend told me not to worry. These people come here to work out and respect others that want to work out. Sure…… they respect others that work out. What I will be doing can’t be called working out. It will be stumbling through. But no mercy, I had to go there. We walked there as a warming up. That took about an hour. Once there we started a run around the field. I ‘ran’, but about halfway through the round I wondered how far I would come, because I already felt like I was going to die. Strangely enough I got through the round.
Then we started five different exercises doing each one for 30 seconds, with 30 second intervals. After doing all five we went for another run around the field. My ‘trainer’ talked to me and I made the mistake to talk back. I wasn’t even halfway round when I had to stop running. I started walking instead, because I was so out of breath I started hyperventilating. I got instructions on how to take control of my breath back, it worked. I learned not to talk while running that day :D. So on to the next round of exercises. At that point someone living in my brain decided to redecorate, because a heavy pounding started. It was worst behind my right eye and man I felt like a zero when I decided that was it, no more training that day, because I was afraid I would get a migraine. The pain behind my eye is an indicator.
We sat down while I took some pills and we drank some water. My friend asked me if I wanted to go on and told me he was already proud of me, regarding that I started below zero condition wise (my own words). I didn’t want to disappoint him too much, so we ran another round around the field and as a sort of cool down we walked the last round. While running I only gave a thumbs up/down or a nod of the head as an answer to the questions that came my way. I ran the full found, on will power. That felt good. So that was our first session, our next session will be better (I hope) :D. I am grateful he is helping me out like that.
The second thing I did was take out my Wii balance board. Every morning before work I start up my Wii fit and ‘work out’ for about half an hour. Someone asked me if you can really call that a work out. Hell yeah, I sweat like crazy and my muscles hurt. The sit-ups we did last Saturday are still hurting. When I have to do them with Wii I can barely lift my body, but I try as well as I can. Thursday is my regular day off so I decided that I would do a bigger workout. As you can see in the picture I booked a lot of minutes :D. I am proud of myself for doing this, even if some people might think it is stupid and childish and it won’t get me where I want to go. I feel good about it, an no one is going to take that from me.
The third thing I intend to do is stop using my laptop/YouTube/Netflix as much as I do now. I have to earn it! So I decided to see myself as a kid that has to be told no. I can do my laptop/YouTube/Netflix two hours tops (trust me, that is cutting waaaaay back) and I start doing other things. Like reading a book or writing the story I was talking about earlier. I won’t promise this will be happening, but writing it down makes it easier I guess, because I put it out in the world now. People I know can ask me about it now and try and keep me to it.
Today was a good start at it. I have not been on the computer until I started writing this blog. O wow, no today was not a good start. I have a smart TV and by way of music I have been listening to ‘Straight Outta Oz (deluxe edition’ from Todrick. Does that count as being on YouTube? I guess… but at least I was doing something productive at the same time (household chores). Well, I am proud of me. I guess this won’t be my last post about this. Write to you soon.